Queer pride is a difficult one for those of us who feel things differently. Do I know what pride feels like? Probably not, not in a way I could explain anyways.
Feeling and showing pride as an alexithymic person is difficult (read Alexithymia and interoception: what the Hell is going on!?). Pride, and other feelings, come with a guide book which has conveniently been thrown out the window. I may have read the first few lines in a 30 page essay on pride but even those I have since forgotten.
Alexythimia does a number on me, confusing me so I don’t know how or what I feel from one minute to the next. Despite this, I have begun to live my life more authentically as a bisexual trans masc non-binary Autistic person and that’s a far cry from how I was with myself a few years back.
This Pride season I shall be content, happy and doing my own thing. Maybe that’s what pride means to me