When I first started this blog in spring 2022, I was focused on Autistic experiences, including executive function, masking and what it means to be both queer and Autistic. I even started to play around with my own terms for shielding, neuro anarchy and attention hyperactivity. Not the most original ideas but definitely things that fit me and my growing understanding of neurodivergence. These first few years I was still trying to understand my autism diagnosis and how I fitted within the world with this new knowledge of myself.

It makes sense that I rabbit-holed into Autistic information, I’m certainly not the first Autistic person to find autism as an area of interest! During the Covid 19 lockdown I read as much as I could to keep my brain busy. I appreciate that I had the privilege to spend this time in deep thought and self-reflection.

I spent years blogging about my own experiences as an Autistic person, however it is not my main area of interest any more. Of course, I’ll always blog from an Autistic perspective because that’s the software I’m working with. A few years back I started reflecting on the research projects I’ve been involved with, to my surprise I started talking about experiences of cancer care, and health care more generally, for disabled and trans people.

I think I’ve settled into this area for a while (there’s nothing like doing a PhD to make you focus on one thing a bit obsessively!). A few years back I started sharing blogs from my PhD Journal which has been really helpful. I find writing is the best way for me to make sense of where I’m at and where I go/grow from here. Although, I wouldn’t say I am interested in any one thing but in how things fit together. How they take shape under oppression and privilege. I am more focused on diving deeper into my anti-racist, intersectional feminist, anarchist, disability justice practice as a researcher, practitioner and human being.

I sometimes wonder if many of those who started following my blog four years ago are still interested in what I write. I also think about the name of my blog, and how this might not fit any more, but when does a blog stop being about Autistic experience when the writer is Autistic? I also wonder what this blog will look like in another four years and what I might write about after finishing my PhD. What will spark my interest and connect me to others?

A few years back these ponderings would have made me spiral but now they make me excited and curious. I’m not going through a whole reinvention of self but a gradual process of learning, unlearning and trying to make sense of it all. Thanks for coming along with me, old, new, or future reader ❤️