These are some of my reflections from the amazing books Me and White Supremacy by Layla F. Saad and The Good Ally by Nova Reid.

White silence is being a bystander to racism, ignoring explicit and implicit violence towards people from the global majority. It can include ignoring racist remarks and behaviours, shrugging these off as “just a joke”, or “it wasn’t meant like that”. White silence can also include the refusal to talk about race and privilege due to feelings of guilt, shame, or anger. I wanted to share my experiences of breaking white silence to make it easier for you to reflect on times you have perpetrated white silence.

I have rarely spoken about racism and racial issues on or offline. I have a nice-sized social media following but have kept quiet on matters that easily intersect with disability and social justice. Hiding behind my screen name it was easy to centre my white Autistic experience, especially when they were reflected in the pages I followed. Reflecting on racism and how this interacts with ableism was not something I considered at all.

In too many Autistic spaces white silence is deafening, as we assume or present our experiences as thee Autistic experience. Sometimes advocacy can further marginalise Autistic people of colour, when they are spoken over, ignored or considered non-existent. Those of us who advocate for ourselves and those we love must widen the circle of those we love and care for.

“Community” means something but can’t whilst we focus on white experiences. Many of us are outraged at the lack of diagnosis for women and trans people but keep quiet about the same experiences of global majority Autistics. We are frustrated at the lack of accommodations for our children whilst ignoring the racism and ableism in schools that Autistic children of colour experience. Asiatu Lawoyin, Autistic abolitionist, educator and coach, writes about how to be authentic commUNITY.

I am still very much working on my white silence offline too. Where my work and social groups are mostly white, race and racism are rarely spoken about. However, there are opportunities for myself and other white people in white-dominated spaces to start these conversations. Recently, I suggested that a student could get involved in anti-racism work through the project she presented at my school. I followed up with an email of resources for her next degree, research project, and life in general. She was very receptive, although surprised, by this idea and has since read into this area and hopefully started healing. I share this as an example of how easy these conversations can be between two white people. I have little to lose in these situations apart from feeling slightly uncomfortable, but my slight discomfort is worth calling people into anti-racism. I am sure with time that this discomfort will lessen as I consistently champion anti-racism. Academia is rife with opportunities to call people in and for us to learn together.

Social justice cannot wait for me to know enough, to stop worrying about how I am perceived. These conversations and actions need to happen now. For too long, I and many other white people have benefited from not having to speak up. No shame – we don’t have time to wallow in shame and guilt. As Maya Angelou said: “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.”

It’s time we all know better and do better.